My confession for the day: I hate dentists. Nothing to be ashamed of, right? Everybody hates dentists.
But I don’t just hate them–I don’t really believe in the whole practice of dentistry. I don’t think I would ever go to the dentist if my husband didn’t make me. And I would certainly never take my young child there. Especially not my sensitive three year old.
But I do go, and I do take my daughter, mostly because I haven’t been able to find any good options to traditional dentistry.
Three months ago I reluctantly took my daughter for her first dental visit, mostly because my husband’s dentist (who he loves–he loves the dentist! seriously, what’s up with that? I mean, my husband is awesome, but what kind of crazy person loves dentists?!?) said she should go when she was three. So my husband kept reminding me till I finally made the appointment. And wouldn’t you know it? She had a cavity. All my efforts to feed her healthy, unprocessed food; all my husband’s efforts to floss and brush her teeth: all wasted, apparently. Maybe cavities are genetic and she got it from me. Heaven knows I’ve had enough of them.
The pediatric dentist then proceeded to ruin any chance she had of not being hated by me (slim chance anyway, since, uh, she’s a dentist) by informing me that the reason my daughter has a cavity is because I breastfeed her at night. Excuse me, but no. If anything, breast milk may actually help prevent tooth decay. But this dentist just rolled her eyes and made a note on her chart when I told her that. So we didn’t exactly get off to a good start.
And then she told me about my options for treatment.
“Well, you can fill it now,” she said. “Or you can wait a few months and then fill it.”
So my choices are a filling, or…a filling.
And that’s the real reason I hate dentists: the way we treat tooth problems has never seemed right to me. If you think about it for a minute, just from an objective perspective, the way we treat cavities sounds about as sensible as the way medieval doctors treated fevers. Hey, there’s a hole in your tooth, so let’s drill it and make it bigger! Then we’ll put some foreign substance in to replace it. (We used to use poison to fill it in, but we realized that wasn’t the greatest idea so now we’re using different chemicals. Don’t worry. They’re perfectly safe.) Seriously, does this make sense to you? Why not just pull out some leeches while we’re at it?
It just seems like there isn’t a lot of focus on prevention, or holistic treatment, or any of the big-picture, get-at-the-real-cause cures that I like about alternative medical approaches. The only preventative measure that you hear about is brushing your teeth. And flossing. Yay. That’s never done me any good. What about diet? What about environment? Isn’t there anything we can do to get at the cause of cavities instead of just fixing them after they appear? Or heck, even fluoride rinses would be better than fillings. Isn’t there any way to help a tooth repair itself instead of destroying it more and replacing the damaged part?
And yes, maybe I’m just bitter because I’ve had a new cavity every time I’ve visited the dentist in the past ten years. After a while it gets old. And I don’t want my daughter to go through the same kind of dental experiences that I have.
After we found my daughter’s cavity, I did some research into alternative dentistry. It was discouraging. Most of the alternative things I’m into, weird though they may seem at first glance, do have science to back them up. I couldn’t find a lot of scientific studies on the results of ozone therapy or the benefits of the Weston Price diet. In fact, most “holistic” dentists are actually regular dentists who don’t use mercury fillings. Not really my idea of an organic, whole-body approach to dental health. But all the alternatives to traditional dentistry seem like–I hate to say it, because people could say this about a lot of things I love–but they seem a bit like quacks to me.
I did try some treatments while we waited three months. I used MI paste, which is supposed to help teeth remineralize, and lots of xylitol (which the dentist recommended). We even switched to fluoride toothpaste. I was hoping we could at least stop the growth of the cavity, and maybe not even have to treat it, since it is a baby tooth. But no luck. Three months later, the cavity is growing. So we went to get the filling.
I won’t even go into describing the nightmare of trying to get the filling done yesterday. (I wasn’t even there for most of it–my husband was with her in the room, but I couldn’t be there since they were using nitrous oxide and I’m pregnant. But the little that I saw has actually given me nightmares.) Suffice it to say that they managed to drill out the cavity, but they couldn’t get the filling finished. My daughter is now walking around with a hole in her tooth, and we’re going to have to go to a different dentist and have her sedated to finish. This is all just awful to me on so many levels. I mean, I’m the kind of mom who’s scared to give her kid Tylenol. I can’t even put into words how scared I am to have her sedated with Versed.
Everything about the situation–forcing her to go through something so painful, drugging her, drilling her tooth–feels wrong to me. I know there are times when you have to do things that your kid doesn’t like for their own good. I get that, and I have no problem with it. (Just watch me respond to her bedtime reluctance, or telling her no to juice or candy. I’m a hard nose. Really.) But it’s really hard to force your kid through something they hate when you’re not convinced it’s the right thing to do. And I’m not convinced. I just can’t seem to find any good alternatives.
If anybody knows some, I’m all ears. Just send me some scientific studies to back them up, okay?
Lisa, I totally share ur hatred of dentists. But I take my children to the dentist. My daughter Katy has a mild form of Autism. She was so afraid of the dentist, its not even funny. We have had to use versed at least 3 times with her. Its not as bad as you might think. I really researched the dentists before we took her. Call them and ask questions. Go visit their offices. Versed makes it so they can’t remember what happens. And they act really drunk too 🙂
One more thing is…the more anxious you are about the dentist, the more anxious your daughter will be. She gets her strength from you…
I also cannot believe they tried to do a filling on a three year old without sedation! There’s gotta be better pediatric dentists in your area. I hope you find a good one 🙂
Traditional dentistry makes sense to me…
If you have an apple with a rotten spot in it, you cut it out, if you have a cancer in your body, you cut it out, if your teeth become rotten, you drill out the rot and fill the hole.
The problem here isn’t dentistry, it is diet and genetics. You are an American thus you have a poor diet. Doesn’t matter if you eat organic, you still eat too many grains and too much sugar (among other things)
Once she is older, it should be easier to keep her mouth clean. It’s hard to brush / floss a preschoolers teeth. Also, kids can’t use mouth wash.
Oh… and I (the aforementioned husband) only love dentists because my mouth feels so clean afterwards.
I don’t enjoy them picking at me, I just love the end result.
I figure going 3 or 4 times a year pays for itself as it is probably part of the reason I never get cavities.
Lisa! So sorry you guys are going through this. But I forgot you’ve had a lot of cavities. And here’s the weird thing…I haven’t. Only two or three in my life. Just went to the dentist last week and they said I have a couple places where my teeth may be getting thin and I MAY develop cavities, so they recommended I start fluoride rinse. But Matt… 3 or 4 times a year seems excessive! But I will say…regular professional dental cleaning is a preventative treatment.
Thanks for the encouragement, everyone! We have an appointment on Friday…it’s just a consultation appointment, but hopefully this new place will be able to fit us in to get the work finished soon. Soon as in next week, not sometime this month! 🙁
I have to go that often actually.
Lisa has wimpy teeth, I have wimpy gums.
Yikes. I haven’t taken William yet… it’s on my ‘to do’ list that I keep forgetting about until it is 11:00 at night and I can’t make an appointment (darn). So sorry about the cavity and sedation… I totally feel your pain. If William had to be sedated I would absolutely feel the same way (like you, I also don’t like giving my kids tylenol) 🙂 Good luck. Good advice from caren about your kids picking up your anxiety, though. I’ll have to keep that in mind whenever I end up taking William.
Oh, and on the post you made about “how crunchy are you” I have to admit I was surprised with just how crunchy I’ve become.
Oh, and I just finished reading “The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding” and specifically remember the part about how breastmilk can help prevent cavities. I don’t think I’d like the dentist much for rolling her eyes either.
Best confession ever.
Fact: Florida depletes the capacity and overall health of your body and your glands (such as your pineal) to dumb you down. No. my future children will not go to the dentist and I will find a way to be organic with the whole body process and complete living BEFORE I have my golden child.
I admire your post it’s the only thing I can find online about the subject I can relate to in thought. Thank you.